Rad Reports on Christina Aguilera
Yeeeah: Christina Aguilera needs more make-up.
LAragmag: DJ AM photoed!
Collegecandy: All about threesomes!!
CO: Aubrey whatever was fired from Puffy's band.
Dlisted: Denis Leary thinks autistic kids are just dumb.
WIMB: Lauren Conrad is over The Hills.
POTP: And she's friends with Heidi Again.
Seriouslyomg: This is how you say CUNT on tv. Twice!
Gabby: Colin Powell dances.
Shit yeah!!
What else do hot girls need to do at a bar but play pattycake with each other. It's just so damn fun! Christina Aguilera and Brittney Murphy bring it back to middle school.
Christina Aguilera was the only naked in the family photo David LaChapelle shot one of these days at his studio. There was a bunch of other people in the shot, including Pamela Anderson, but they didn't look as interesting as Xtina. It's the shoes, I think! If you want to see the rest of this art on film, please click heeeeere.
Christina Aguilera as part of David LaChapelle's old school family portrait. I had to get rid of the squiggly little line, right? Now if you want to see the whole fam, including Pamela Anderson, click heeeeere.
I know absolutely nothing about bra measurements. All I know about them is they're either big or small and hard to take off. And sometimes soft and pretty and other times dirty and nappy. But that's another topic the point of all this is I guess people have been wondering the size of Christina Aguilera's bra since she became pregnant. Well here:
"It's kind of hilarious! I've never fit into an E-cup before." "I look at my husband and go, 'Guess what size this bra is?' And when I tell him, he's just amazed. We keep the tags that prove it, to look back for memory's sake!"
You know her husband doesn't keep the tags. He doesn't want to remember them! He wants them to stay around forever!
 There's only two ways to be as incredibly pale as Jordan Bratman. Live life like a vampire, or check out massive pointing bammers! You can die from shit like that!
Christina Aguilera is loving this attention though. There's no way she's hiding her greatest asset right now. Not the boobs! Bratman!
 Unless you're in Motley Crue or wish you were in Motley Crue, and a guy, you probably know nothing about make up application. I wish I was in Motley Crue but still know nothing about make up. There is some douche on YouTube who will show you the correct way to apply make up like KISS, just type in "KISS Make Up" or something like that, I really don't know. It's dumb anyways what the hell!
The point of all this is I was curious what Christina Aguilera's face looked like really close. Yep, pretty much what it looks like far away.
 Christina Aguilera has NO problem getting out of the bar sloppy drunk. Everybody wants to help. What the hell!
There's so much prejudice going on I think I might start spewing. Spew! Think about it. I know for a fact I've never been politely escorted out of any bar. It's always get outta here kid. Hey kid! You're fucking wasted!
Maybe I just need to grow a massive set of bammers and show 'em off to everybody. Yeah that'll work.
Christina Aguilera and her bammers went and checked some art! They also listened to some Lionel.
Dirrty brought her husband Jordan to the opening of the Broad Contemporary Art Museum in downtown LA.
The event, with $100,000 tables, attracted Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, Petra Nemcova, Nicole Richie, Maria Shriver and Dennis Hopper, and a performance by Lionel Richie because the museum really wants that Lionel head. Here's some bammers.
    
Am I the only one who thinks this is pretty crazy? Today is Keith Richards, Brad Pitt and Christina Aguilera's birthday. Keith is the coolest, Brad is the prettiest and Xtina is the whoriest. Nipple rings totally qualify as whorey and hot as shit.
Oh yeah, Katie Holmes was also born today, along with Steven Spielberg, DMX, Stone Cold Steve Austin and Leonard Maltin. Remind me to do it with my future wife exactly nine months before today so I make one of these gold printing babies. Is it cool to gold dig baby make? Like, pimp out your future baby?
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